This column came out of The Washington Post‘s alarm for belief from readers about what movies, TV shows, books and added works accept fabricated them cry. Read added of those belief here.
I about died of Stage 4 tongue blight two years ago and, anytime since, I accept bare to accept the Big Cry. I aggregate my charge with my minister, but to no avail. I afresh batten with addition minister, but no tears there either. I warned my nutritionist that I aloof ability breach bottomward and cry on her watch — but nah, it never happened. I am aloof too blocked.
But, aback I was younger, I had two decidedly Big Cries — at movies — that apparent cogent moments in my relationships:
In “The Remains of the Day,” Anthony Hopkins plays a butler in a abundant English home. He is a constant available boarded to confined a adept with arbitrary leanings. He is accustomed a anniversary off. He rents a car to go and adduce to a long-lost love. During the trip, he gets a bit addled at a bar — although he is a man of few words, he strikes up a conversation, which leads to his character actuality exposed: He is not a “gentleman,” but a servant. His afterwards attack to acquisition a wife ends in tatters.
I was distinct until able-bodied into my 40s. I placed array of Washingtonian annual ISO ads but annihilation panned out. I could never acquisition Ms. Right. Until I met her, aback she abounding our book club for the alone time. She was a advocate — pretty, accomplished and age appropriate. I pursued her with zest. Although I was a bureaucrat, 40 pounds overweight, I now would analysis my approach that I could consistently “win the girl” if I anytime begin the appropriate one.
We went to “The Remains of the Day” on our third date.
Two-thirds of the way through the film, I put my accoutrements about her. Afterwards a moment, she pulled abroad and whispered, “I don’t anticipate of you that way.” I said, “Yes, but. . .” She said, “No, amuse don’t.”
The accordance amid the bedevilled adventurous fates of the butler on the awning and the ambassador (me) in the cinema got to me. I spent the blow of the blur bawl quietly, while she sat abutting to me uncomfortably. It’s odd, isn’t it, that neither of us larboard the amphitheater — was the blur so good?
I never saw her again. But, a year or so later, she larboard a bulletin for me at assignment — I was affianced by then. I alleged her aback but did not ask her why she had called. We admired anniversary added able-bodied — and that was the end of that.
Years later, I saw “Truly Madly Deeply,” in which Nina (Juliet Stevenson) has absent her lover, Jamie (Alan Rickman), who died adolescent of a cold. There is a arena area Nina shares her affliction with her therapist. It’s the best amazing achievement — Stevenson absolutely loses it. It is a wrenching, snot-everywhere, adverse scene.
I saw it on my fourth date with my approaching wife, Carolyn. I had aggregate with her the cine “Women in Love,” which she enjoyed. She afresh aggregate “Truly Madly Deeply,” her admired film, which we watched on DVD on my couch.
In the film, Jamie comes aback as a apparition to Nina. He moves aback into her accommodation with a agglomeration of his associate ghosts, who absorb best of their time watching old movies. Nina gradually gets on with her activity —without Jamie. She finds a new boyfriend. As she gets accessible for a date with the new guy, she cautiously tells Jamie that it’s time he confused on. He agrees but with reluctance.
Cut to a arena of Nina advancing out the advanced door, bottomward the steps, to get into her new boyfriend’s car. We see, over her head, Jamie and his buddies advancing to the window to see her off. There is a absent affliction in Jamie’s eyes. We apprehend Bach’s Cello Sonata in G Minor — Jamie was a cellist.
At this point, lying on the couch, in Carolyn’s arms, I bawled and bawled and bawled. Carolyn kept captivation me close.
We were affiliated anon thereafter. We both inscribed the words “Truly Madly Deeply” on the autogenous of our bells rings.
I afterwards told my wife that I had never aggregate a assignment of art with addition with as cutting an aftereffect as aback she accomplished me with “Truly Madly Deeply.” I told her I envied her in that regard. She asked me why I anticipation I begin the blur so moving. I told her the afterimage of Jamie attractive out that window at his lover activity out with addition man encapsulated my absolute adulation activity — until I met her.
Carolyn said that I had absolutely misread the film: It was the adventure of a woman who, afterwards abundant effort, had assuredly freed herself from an over-controlling man.
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